There is one thing that drives mean people crazy. It can drive them into fury and attack mode. Half the time the catalyst doesn’t even realize they did anything infuriating.
When I was a school kid, I got bullied big time by three kids on my bus. It went on from the time I was in 3rd grade until 7th grade. Somewhere along the lines one of my bully’s father got sick and died. I felt really really bad for him, and even though he had made my life hell, and did some serious damage that residually effects my self esteem, I sent him a sympathy card.
When he eventually returned to school after his father’s death, he was quiet for a few days then started in on me again worse than ever. His older sister reprimanded him, reminding him that I had been kind enough to send him a card, but he never stopped harassing me, in fact he got worse.
Bullies and mean people are full of rage. They can make you think that you’re the one who set them off, and even if you apologize to them for so called setting them off, they will get mad at you for doing that too. Bullies love to hate, and the one thing they hate more than hate is love. You can shower a mean person with all the love in your body and soul and they will still hurt you and then even kick you when you’re already down.
Everyone knows bullies hate themselves, and resent anyone for trying to get into their cold padlocked hearts. Not only do they hate them, but they’ll make them pay for it too.
When you show kindness to a bully, even though they don’t really deserve it, they will lash out on you. They hate you for showing them kindness because they know they don’t really deserve kindness from you. They know they have caused you sadness and pain and they can’t stand the fact that the very person they’ve been tormenting is kind enough to show them love after all they’ve done. Nothing makes a bully feel lower. They know they’re wrong but they’ll never apologize for their actions, because they are unable to take responsibility for themselves or admit to themselves they have erred.
So the cycle of hate continues. There is nothing a bully hates more than love and kindness, well, maybe they hate butterflies and sunshine too- just sayin’. Seriously though, there is no getting through to them.
They are surrounded by cold steel bars, and believe me, no one from the outside could ever get inside of their cold padlocked hearts. The only way a bully will or can change is from within, but if that’s going to happen, they need to spend a lot of time looking at themselves- and they don’t like mirrors either.