Category Archives: Fairy Tales

by | May 9, 2012 · 3:32 am

Absynthe, Tinkerbell, and Never Never Land

The above painting, L’absinthe, is by far one of my favorite Degas’. I like it more than any one of his ballerinas. This is probably because of the raw emotion it exhibits or maybe because I can identify more with a drunk than I do a ballerina… This painting illustrates the addict, the drunk, at her lowest. As I look at the piece, I can hear the clamoring and clinking of glasses— the commotion of the bar is so loud yet she hears none of it as she sits there in a world of her own. Maybe she stopped by the bar for a drink after working her day away at a hazardous industrial era mill. No wonder she looks so miserable… Continue reading →

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by | April 10, 2012 · 12:19 am

Painter of Light, Dead at 54

 

On Friday April 6th, famous “painter of light” Thomas Kinkade died. Kinkade is known not only for his beautifully cheerful paintings but his strong faith and belief in Christianity. Within many of his paintings, he hid the names of his family members as well as Christian messages and symbolism such as the fish that he painted under his every signature. His nickname, “painter of light,” is likely a reference to the Renaissance; the era where the techniques of point of view and specifically light and shadow depiction were technically developed and perfected. In this era, the technique chiaroscuro was born. Chiaroscuro is a technique that utilizes light and dark shades and shadows to create realistic depth through usage of these various contrasting tonalities. The discovery of this way of painting light and shadow was drastic in comparison to the Byzantine style used throughout the middle ages.

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by | April 4, 2012 · 9:00 am

Becoming the woman I used to be

Lay, Lady, Lay

by Bob Dylan

 

Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed

Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed

Whatever colors you have in your mind

I’ll show them to you and you’ll see them shine.

 

Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed

Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed

Until the break of day, let me see you make him smile

His clothes are dirty but his hands are clean

And you’re the best thing that he’s ever seen.

 

Stay, lady, stay, stay with your man awhile

Why wait any longer for the world to begin

You can have your cake and eat it too

Why wait any longer for the one you love

When he’s standing in front of you.

 

Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed

Stay, lady, stay, stay while the night is still ahead

I long to see you in the morning light

I long to reach for you in the night

Stay, lady, stay, stay while the night is still ahead?

 

I’ve been too sad lately, it’s been 8 years and I should be over my former husband by now. Everyone wants me to be over it, so that’s how I pretend to be. I miss more than the man, I miss who I was with him. How easy it was to be myself, think what I wanted, feel what I wanted, express what I wanted, be quiet when I wanted. He thought so highly of me, more than I deserved. He was a plain man, quiet, funny with his close friends and  tough as hell, he treated waitresses like they were princesses and his word was gold. I was so proud that someone that good loved me. I don’t do well in captivity but like anyone else I want a soft place to land, and he was mine.

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Filed under Dreams, Fairy Tales, Growth, Healing, Heart, Life Lessons, Love, relationships

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by | February 14, 2012 · 4:02 pm

Don’t Get Even, Get Shoes

A while back I mentioned an article I was writing about online dating. I referred to it as “online dating turned unintentional social experiment.”  I haven’t posted it yet but I will. For now, I have decided I am done with online dating. I deleted my account after getting one too many pictures of body parts I never wanted to see let alone asked for pictures of. Online dating was more like channel surfing than anything. It got to the point where I ignored 99.99% of the guys that messaged me, even the really cute ones, because I knew they were wrong for me, so why waste their time (and mine). I had been a few weeks without it -before I reopened my account this last time. Those few weeks were boring yet productive. Now what would I do with the time in between doing the other things that I usually do? I still didn’t have a boyfriend so naturally my mind gravitated to the next best thing: shoes.

Shoes that might be worth paying over $400 for...

Money cannot buy love but it can buy shoes! And I found a really great place for people on a sort of shoe budget- a shoe of the month club ran by Kimora Lee Simons. Each month you get a new pair of shoes or boots. Each month a fee of $39.95 is charged to you credit card. This price is what I would consider mid-grade. I am not someone who buys Christian Louboutins or Jimmy Choos. Even if I could light hundred dollar bills on fire without flinching, the idea of spending $400+ on a pair of shoes is kind of ridiculous…well…unless they were really, really cute shoes. Then it’s a different story. I sometimes bought shoes from Macy’s and Jessica Simpson- those were in the $100 prices range give or take $30. That was until I discovered the shoe section at my local Target and they have very nice shoes in the $30 price range. Continue reading →

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by | November 13, 2011 · 10:52 pm

Repeat Relationships: What Story Do You Keep Retelling?

Warning: When Participating in Relationships You Run the Risk of Getting Hurt

That’s what they say- if you don’t want to get hurt, lock yourself in your boudoir or something. When I was younger, the more someone warned me not to go out with a person, the more I wanted to go out with them and to prove the other person wrong. I thought I was Cinderella when her evil step mother locked her in the basement to keep her from meeting the prince. I thought maybe they were trying to keep me away from the guy because they were jealous and wanted him for themselves. Nope. They were worried, and they had reasons.

I heard a wise man talking about the way we repeat the same patterns over and over again in our lives; the same scenario but with new people every time. It is the same, he said, as when a small child wants you to read them the same story over and over again. I can’t stop thinking about this. It is a significant statement, but I don’t know why. It may be the key to me breaking jerk-dating pattern. I remember when I was a child I would want to read the same story over and over again or watch the same movie over and over again. Each time was equally if not more satisfying than the first. It never got boring. Why?

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by | November 6, 2011 · 10:13 pm

Playing Dress-Up in Greenwich, Connecticut

*** This is an excerpt from my book about failed relationships coming out at the end of the year!

I remember when I was in elementary school one of my friends told me that when she was on vacation in Disney World if someone asked where she was from and she told them she was from Connecticut, they immediately assumed she was rich. I was perplexed. She had an in-ground pool but certainly didn’t live in a gated community. Our families were predominately from Waterbury, Connecticut, a remnant of the long-gone industrial era.

I discovered when I went to an out of state college that what she said was true, that when you tell people you are from Connecticut they assume you live in a neighborhood on par with one of the most affluent ones in Greenwich. Years ago I had never been to Greenwich and wondered what this place was like. The richest town in the entire country would surely be something to see. I imagined that I would be pegged an outsider from the second my 2001 Kia Sportage crossed over the city limits. I was very wrong.

I got a job working for a holistic beauty company and had to go to various health food retailers. Now I had to drive down towards the Gold Coast for work at least once a month. My first experience there was good and it really hasn’t changed since I began working in that area.

One day I answered an ad on Craigslist. They needed bartenders and servers. I sent them my resume and a picture and was hired immediately and asked to come down the next day. Not only would I be bartending in Greenwich, but on a yacht! I would be lying if I told you I was excited. No, I reacted as I usually do when something really great and exciting happens in my life: I was terrified! I had never answered an ad on Craigslist before and feared it wasn’t legit. A yacht? Really? As usual, I pictured worst-cases-scenarios in my head; the yacht taking off with me and other unsuspecting young “bartenders” on it, carrying us out to sea awaiting some sort of mass-auction, our introduction into sexual slavery. Yes I know, I don’t deny that I’m a little crazy. I lived on the Mexican border for a year and never ventured south for the same reason. It’s funny, how someone who has lived to tell the tale of so many risky and dangerous events can be so scared and cautious. I would wager that it is because I lived to tell the tale of so many risky and dangerous events!

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by | October 24, 2011 · 5:49 pm

No Such Thing as Love Like in the Movies?

I have been told there is no love like in the movies. I disagree. For example, this weekend I went with my boyfriend to his family’s cabin in Vermont just over the border of Western Mass. It was a beautiful weekend, the fall leaves cascaded from the oaks and maples like delicate Chantilly drapery. Saturday afternoon, we road our mountain bikes to a summit where we had a picnic. It was perfect, he’s so sweet, he even brought my favorite, lavender champagne! To be honest, most of the weekend, we were cut off from the rest of the world holed up in the cabin’s foyer under its vaulted ceilings. It was so cozy by the roaring fireplace. The heat lit the room like a grenade in a fox hole.

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by | June 2, 2011 · 12:22 pm

Lunch with Hansel and Gretel

kinkade
It took some intense psychoanalyzing and a ton of candy to keep me buzzing, but I think I finally figured out why I love Thomas Kinkade so much: because his cottages remind me of one of my favorite fairy tales, “Hansel and Gretel.”

Who could forget these two innocent German children who wander into the woods after their parents abandon them? The story intensifies as they soon happen upon a house made of chocolates, gingerbread cakes, and candies; a life size gingerbread house, every child’s dream! I remember the first time my grandmother told me this story. A real house made of dessert? I had to see it for myself. My eyes widened in anticipation.

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by | May 4, 2011 · 5:00 pm

A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes…

My friends hate Disney World. This bothers me. I don’t hate Disney, although they’re a huge corporation; a big conglomerate that doesn’t stop at Disney but sprawls over oceans and across continents like most historic empires. I don’t think my friends hate them for this reason either. Although they blame their hatred of all things Disney on their high ticket prices, and $5 bottles of water, I think it is something that goes deeper than this.

Lately, I’ve heard a lot of talk about people disliking Disney’s “Princess” message, and that it’s dangerous for little girls to grow up thinking they are one day going to find their “prince charming and live happily ever after.” I will admit to being a victim of this mentality, but reality made sure it didn’t last for long. I don’t think I’m the only woman who after years of dating jerks and creeps, was surprised to find out that even “Prince Charming” is less than perfect, human if you will. Regardless of this surprise, I still don’t hate Disney.

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