For a while I have been thinking about free will versus destiny. I believe that in a way they both exist, but I also believe that using free will isn’t always in your best interest. I see destiny as the path you’re meant to take and free will as the option to go off course. In my experience, going off course has only led to set backs, that for myself, resulted in wasted money, time, and opportunities. I had the free will to do what I wanted, to go off my path, and made decisions that I knew were bad for me at the time. I did what I wanted, and ultimately destiny’s pull was too strong to resist, and I ended up back on it’s path. I believe that following your destiny is in your best interest, and that while free will exists, utilizing it is not always a good idea. Below is an example of what I’m talking about.
Often times, people attempt to take the easy way out. They feel the exciting pull of destiny, encouraging them to follow their dreams, but in order to do that, they must step out of their comfort zone. People who take the easy way out are not ready to do that. Instead the stay in a job they hate and spend their time doing everything but what their hearts are begging them to do. If you ask them why, they don’t quit their jobs and pursue their dreams the only true answer once you cut past a bevy of excuses is that it is easier not to. I disagree.
You can not try, or you can go out there and reach for the stars. Regardless of which path you choose, you will face resistance and adversity from the outside world and from yourself, except, if you choose to follow your dreams, your destiny, you will have a much happier result than if you decided not to do so deeming it too hard. It just might take a while. The person who has chosen the path of what they perceive to be “the easy way out,” is utilizing free will. This someone feels the pull of a dream or a goal and through their own free will has decided to ignore it. Will their longing go away that easily? You tell me. They have chosen to stay in a job or relationship that makes them miserable because it is like the devil you know…. If you are in this position of misery it is usually a great indication that you’re not following your destiny.
Another piece of evidence that favors the existence of destiny over free will is love.
When I was twelve years-old, we took a long drive to a farm in upstate New York. I was finally going to get a dog. I’d always wanted a little girl dog. I was so excited that I even bought a ton of bows and ribbons for her hair. We pulled up to the farm, its front lawn stretched far out in front of the house. There was a small play pen out front with three little white puppies yipping and jumping on each other. We got out of the car, and the breeder asked me to help carry one of the puppies into the house for her. Of course I obliged. She pulled a puppy from the small pen and handed it to me.
I cradled it in my arm like a baby. As soon as that puppy looked up at me with those eyes, I knew I was sunk. Please, let it be a girl dog, I thought. I looked down, nope.
I brought him into the house unsure of what to do.
The woman put him in a pen with the other two puppies, both girls. In my mind I deliberated….well I really want a girl, so I can put all those bows in her hair and give her a pretty name…. I watched as the two girl puppies jumped and bit at each other as they chased each other in circles and growled. The little boy just sat there. He looked left out from the fun yet clearly disinterested in joining the girls who also occasionally tried to provoke him. Still, he sat there reserved and calm. I really wanted one of the girl puppies, so i could put the cute little pink bows with lace in her hair…
I thought some more, and watched them. The more I watched, the less appealing the girl puppies became. “Did you decide yet, Hayl?” My dad asked.
Reluctantly I exhaled, “the boy one.”
So they handed me the boy one, and I named him QT Pie, and he even let me put bows in his hair sometimes. Usually my mom would yell at me for putting them in his hair and force me to take them out,
“But they are blue bows!” I’d protest.
“Take it out of his hair Hayley!” She’d insist.
“But he looks so cute.” He didn’t really mind wearing the bows, but I think eventually, my mother either threw them out or hid them from me. My point is that we never choose when or who we fall in love with, nor can we control those emotions. To me, this is the biggest piece of evidence in the favor of destiny over free will debate. Love is proof that free will is a fallacy. We don’t get to choose who we fall in love with, whether it’s a person, place, or pet. Falling in love is proof of destiny: it’s as if our heart has made it’s choice before it was ever presented with one.
you are not thinking this through. feelings come and go and emotions may wax and wane but true love is an act of the will. like scripture says, Love is patient, kind, long suffering, ect. true love is not contingent on the response of the other. you love someone even when they are unloveable. ask any parent if their kids ever brought them grief and most will say yes. ask if they stopped loving them because of it and most will say of course not! it like that with lots of relationships. friends and lovers have let me down in the past as i am sure i have disappointed them but we still care for each other. you choose to love even when you don’t feel like it. it is childish to say you can’t control your emotions because as an adult you have to. know matter how attracted to a person you might be if you are a decent human being you don’t act on those emotions if they are for the husband of your best friend. a selfish person could justify it saying they were caught up in the moment and swept away heedless of the damage they were doing. but would that explanation be acceptable to you if you were betrayed? destiny is used too often by people to excuse or even justify their whims and choices. ironic, no? As Daria noted: “Manifest Destiny was the belief some people had that the United States should be connected from the Atlantic to the Pacific Ocean. these people did not include any Mexicans or Native Americans.” Shakespeare summed it up best on destiny :”The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, But in ourselves.”
I count him braver who overcomes his desires than him who conquers his enemies; for the hardest victory is over self.
Aristotle
Freedom is nothing but a chance to be better.
Albert Camus