Why I Wrote My Memoir

“One morning, I unexpectedly awoke from a beautiful dream. I was on a cruise ship, it was early in the morning, the sun had just started to come up. I went outside onto the main deck. I walked to one side of the ship. I leaned against the rail and watched the pastel hues of pinks, blues, and oranges, dance gloriously on the ocean’s soft currents. It wasn’t often I got up to see an early morning sunrise and certainly had never seen one this beautiful. Upon a second glance at the water, I was stunned by what I saw. Within the glittering ocean waded thousands of beautiful dolphins.”

(From I Know Why They Call a Shell a Shell)

This was the first time the dolphins ever appeared to me. It was a breathtaking site, but being a strong believer of shamanism, I knew that it was no mistake, that it was more than a dream.

Continue reading

2 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

My First Book is Out!

This morning, I am excited to announce that my first book “I Know Why They Call a Shell a Shell”  is now available for download on Amazon.com

Here is the book’s synopsis:

Told through the lens of the sea, each of the book’s five sections chronicle the main character’s journey away from tumultuous love affairs by weaving stories of her past with stories from literature, music, and visual art of both modern and classical significance.

After nearly being murdered by a boyfriend, Hayley promises herself that she will never let a man abuse her again. She figures that making this change, from dating abusive men to normal ones, should be as easy as flicking off a light switch, but soon finds that even after she’s made the conscious decision to no longer involve herself in unhealthy relationships, the rest of her has yet to catch up with that thought. Still caught up in the dramaturgy of her relationships’ past, she sets off on an emotional voyage to discover how she ended up on the shores of coastal New England.

The book is a work of creative non-fiction, a memoir of sorts. The e-version is available for download. Retail price $9.99

You can find it by following this link.

Comments Off on My First Book is Out!

Filed under Uncategorized

My Book is Here!

Late this afternoon my book should be available for download on Amazon. I’m sorry about the delay- I will post an article about that later. Coming soon: a hard copy edition. In the meantime, here is the book’s synopsis:

Told through the lens of the sea, each of the book’s five sections chronicle the main character’s journey away from tumultuous love affairs by weaving stories of her past with stories from literature, music, and visual art of both modern and classical significance.

After nearly being murdered by a boyfriend, Hayley promises herself that she will never let a man abuse her again. She figures that making this change, from dating abusive men to normal ones, should be as easy as flicking off a light switch, but soon finds that even after she’s made the conscious decision to no longer involve herself in unhealthy relationships, the rest of her has yet to catch up with that thought. Still caught up in the dramaturgy of her relationships’ past, she sets off on an emotional voyage to discover how she ended up on the shores of coastal New England.

6 Comments

Filed under By the Sea, Journal, Writing

We Are All (Fat) Kids at Heart

Well maybe not you but I know that I am. Show me a skinny woman and I will show you someone who desperately wants a donut. Yes, a donut.

I never liked donuts and aside from the Dunkin Donut’s Munchkins they had at  elementary school functions, I barely ate one until I was in my late teens and even then I didn’t like them. Enter Krispy Kreme.

My now ex-boyfriend and I were on the road somewhere in the midwest when we started to run into them. The gleaming case of donuts was the edible equivalent of the display of a jewelry store. With so many delicious -looking varieties, it was difficult to decide which ones to get so we did what any sane person would do in that situation- we got over a dozen then ate most of them that morning. We were camping and didn’t have a huge budget, so we did the same thing for the next few mornings until I finally said, “I think we should probably stop eating donuts. We might get fat or something.”

“Or something?”

“Ya. Diabetes.

“Oh.”

 

Continue reading

10 Comments

Filed under Fun

Chris Brown: Acting like Chris Brown, Again

In recent news, Chris Brown was caught acting like Chris Brown, again, and I’m not surprised.

As you know I rarely say anything bad about anybody, minus Chris Brown, my uncle, and that horrible ex-boyfriend I bring up every once in a while. I don’t really hold grudges against people either…well okay, there are a few, and one of them happens to be Chris Brown. Though I do not know him or Rihanna personally, I cannot stand him for what he did to her. I never saw a black eye that bad in my life, the fact that it was on the face of a petite girl only amplifies its intensity. Though it’s not my place to judge, after his appearance at the Grammy’s this week, I find myself wondering if someone like him deserves forgiveness or should be doomed to a life of social purgatory.

A friend once told me a story about a time that they were waiting for their flight in an airport terminal. Airport terminals aren’t loud but they can be fairly noisy. As he was waiting for the plane to board, the room suddenly became completely silent: you could hear the cliched pin drop. Why did everyone stop talking? He wondered, and then he got his answer when he saw OJ Simpson walk by.

There is no doubt in my mind that this is the way OJ was greeted every time he went out in public- until he was incarcerated, again. Does Chris Brown deserve this kind of treatment? Again, it’s not for me to say, but I know if I came face to face with him, I certainly wouldn’t give him the time of day. I think the only way to judge a situation like his is to think about his character and if it has improved since he got caught beating Rihanna. I say got caught because it is pretty hard to believe, with the severity of her injuries, that this was the first time in his life that he slipped and lost control of his fists.

Continue reading

8 Comments

Filed under Domestic Violence, Entertainment News, relationships

Don’t Get Even, Get Shoes

A while back I mentioned an article I was writing about online dating. I referred to it as “online dating turned unintentional social experiment.”  I haven’t posted it yet but I will. For now, I have decided I am done with online dating. I deleted my account after getting one too many pictures of body parts I never wanted to see let alone asked for pictures of. Online dating was more like channel surfing than anything. It got to the point where I ignored 99.99% of the guys that messaged me, even the really cute ones, because I knew they were wrong for me, so why waste their time (and mine). I had been a few weeks without it -before I reopened my account this last time. Those few weeks were boring yet productive. Now what would I do with the time in between doing the other things that I usually do? I still didn’t have a boyfriend so naturally my mind gravitated to the next best thing: shoes.

Shoes that might be worth paying over $400 for...

Money cannot buy love but it can buy shoes! And I found a really great place for people on a sort of shoe budget- a shoe of the month club ran by Kimora Lee Simons. Each month you get a new pair of shoes or boots. Each month a fee of $39.95 is charged to you credit card. This price is what I would consider mid-grade. I am not someone who buys Christian Louboutins or Jimmy Choos. Even if I could light hundred dollar bills on fire without flinching, the idea of spending $400+ on a pair of shoes is kind of ridiculous…well…unless they were really, really cute shoes. Then it’s a different story. I sometimes bought shoes from Macy’s and Jessica Simpson- those were in the $100 prices range give or take $30. That was until I discovered the shoe section at my local Target and they have very nice shoes in the $30 price range. Continue reading

5 Comments

Filed under Dating, Fairy Tales, Fun, Healing, Life Lessons, Love

Rescue Animal of the Week

Milo- one of the new kitties

Last night when I was volunteering at the animal shelter, I heard some very sad stories about how we acquired two lovely new cats. I will not tell you the story, it is heartbreaking. Just know that they are happy, healthy and safe now. People can be really terrible when it comes to animals. Just hearing about those cats and other stories reminded me of why I started The Veggie Stand in the first place…though it is closed until further notice, I felt the need to perpetuate the awareness of adopting and rescuing animals.

So now that The Veggie Stand has officially moved back to Hayley’s Comments, in honor of this merger, I would like to continue a weekly column from The Veggie Stand called “Rescue Animal of the Week.” Each week we will feature a different rescue animal- if you’d like to see your pet or a friend’s as the next Rescue Animal of the Week on Hayley’s Comments, please provide the following information by emailing it to me at HRH@HayleysComments.com

A picture of your pet

Your pet’s name

Your name, city and state

Where did your pet come from?

How did you come to adopt/ rescue your animal?

And anything else you would like us to include about your animal.

Check out past Rescue Animals of the Week here

I hope to hear from you and your pet soon!

Don’t forget to subscribe or to Like Hayley’s Comments on Facebook!

4 Comments

Filed under Animal Rights

Didn’t Whitney Houston Have It All?

A quick note about Whitney Houston

So many people look at Whitney Houston and other rich and famous celebrities like Lindsay Lohan with disdain. How could someone so beautiful and talented throw it all away? They wonder. They are so ungrateful, they say. It is easy to jump on this hate filled bandwagon, as gossip and trashing the lives of those more rich and famous than ourselves seems to be part of the American culture, but step away and look at the big picture. Did Whitney Houston really have it all? Beauty? yes. Talent? Yes. Money? Yes. Health? No.

These women, like many other people in and out of the spotlight are suffering from a debilitating mental illness called addiction. Addiction can rob you of your life for years and still not kill you. People like Lindsay Lohan and Whitney Houston haven’t been themselves for decade(s). From the outside, the fix looks obvious, but from the inside, every waking moment and even the most simple of tasks is like hard labor. For them, what you and I would call life is thought of as the time spent in between getting a fix.

While the unaddicted are whole (think 100%), the addicted are working with a deficit, a void they will spend years trying to fill with all the wrong things and people. People blame Bobby Brown for introducing Whitney into a world of drugs. This isn’t entirely accurate. He may have introduced her to drugs, but the void was already there before he came around. He didn’t make her susceptible, she already was. She was too weak to say no to a drama filled relationship with him in favor of looking out for her own best interest and too weak to say no to drugs as well. But why? Quite simply, it all comes down to self-esteem. Around the time Bobby Brown came into her life, she was already a pretty big deal. Everyone thought the world of her and maybe she didn’t believe it. Maybe she was too humble to accept this adoration, maybe there was a little voice inside of her screaming that she wasn’t perfect like everyone thought she was, and maybe just maybe she decided she needed to prove it. Doing so would certainly take some of the pressure off.  So even without him it is likely that she would’ve found her way to this type of lifestyle eventually.

It is an unfortunate story with a tragic ending but even astronomical scientists have observed that it is often the biggest and brightest of stars that burn out the fastest.

8 Comments

Filed under Addiction, Destiny, Domestic Violence, Entertainment News

American Kitsch

Just one of the Paul Bunyon and Babe the Blue Ox I sawon this trip, Northern California

Connecticut has been determined to be the state with the highest percentage of Italian people. Although I live in the best area in the country for Italian food, I don’t go to any of those independently owned Italian restaurants. Being raised by my half Italian mother was enough to make me capable in the kitchen. I don’t like to brag… lol…but most will agree my sauce is better than any they’ve ever tasted, so why would I bother to go to a Italian restaurant? For years, I scoffed at the idea of going to one when I can just make my own food. Indian food is another story, I cannot make Indian food to save my life! It was rare that I ever went to an Italian restaurant until one day when they locally built an Olive Garden. Continue reading

6 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

The Love of My Life Has Renal Failure

It has been a very stressful last several months for me. Care taking for others has been taking its toll on me and now I get some very sad news.

When I was a child I had a stuffed animal. I held onto it so much that eventually, it began to fall apart. There was only so much my grandmother could do to patch it back together. There was many a leg-transplant and arm transplant. And the patches she made couldn’t sustain the continuous amount of holes that kept cropping up. One day I retired it, I was too old and it was also too old. It was a sad day nonetheless.

My old pal Sandy- or what now can only be described as a rag doll

Continue reading

7 Comments

Filed under Friendship, Growth, Healing, Heart, Inspirational, Journal, Life Lessons, Love